Helps for Holiness

I just want to share some miscellaneous tips and pointers regarding measures that can be taken to aid the pursuit of holiness. Do not feel like you have to do any of these specific suggestions I here make; holiness itself certainly does not consist in any of them. I just wanted to share a few auxiliaries that I have personally found helpful. You might not. No worries! Feel free to take a cafeteria approach to this list: take what you like, leave what you don’t. So please remember this disclaimer here if you find yourself feeling a bit offended by anything I say below: I cannot help but write with passion! But I don’t actually intend to categorically condemn anything I mention here, or push any one suggestion here with too much vigor.

  • Open up your monthly budget and figure out what expenses you can trim away. Simplifying your life financially can free you of enormous shackles; perhaps it would enable you to stop overworking and start dedicating more of your life to prayer, family, and works of mercy!
    • Perhaps your house payment is the burden; consider whether you really need all of the space your current house gives you, and consider downsizing or subletting a room.
    • Maybe it is your car payments/repairs/insurance/gasoline bills. Consider moving closer to what you actually need to do (especially consider moving within walking distance to a daily Mass!) and replacing endeavors you now drive to with those you can walk to. Consider fewer cars for your family, or at least smaller and cheaper cars. Worried about the safety of these? Drive more safely! (And pray more to your gaurdian angel.)
    • Perhaps it is your food bill. Dear friends, stop thinking you need to eat like a king at every meal, and you can cut your food bill to a fraction of what it now is, by purging yourself of the perceived need for meat, juice, milk, and fresh fruit with every meal, chasing every health food fad no matter the cost, being completely inflexible in your preferences and insisting upon very specific foods and brands no matter the price fluctuations, etc.
    • Are you really honest with yourself about your “need” for these vacations that cost thousands of dollars in plane tickets, hotels, and restaurants? Aren’t there plenty of trips you could take to relax and renew yourself within a reasonable drive that would cost very little?
    • How many paid accounts, memberships, and subscriptions are now draining your resources? Do you really need them?
    • Forget about buying new things and instead look at the local thrift store and your local Craigslist for the same thing used (especially before purchasing any item over $100).
    • Go more bare bones on your insurance policies and replace what you lose in that regard with trust in Providence.
  • Throw away a huge amount of things. “But Pope Francis condemns our throw-away culture!!” Yes he does, as he ought! But the primary problem with our throw away culture is not the throwing away itself — of material belongings– rather, it is the wasteful amassing of worldly fluff that necessitates the throwing away; the incessant purchasing of things that are completely unnecessary and only complicate life, or things that are actually designed to break or be thrown away in a short amount of time. So please, throw away your clutter with a clear conscience. If anything has real value, then give it to a charity or Goodwill, or sell it on Ebay or Craigslist and do something good with the proceeds.
    • De-cluttering your life can be incredibly beneficial to your spiritual life. Many people are utterly chained to their clutter, not knowing how very negatively this is impacting their pursuit of holiness. If you are among them, only a radical measure will suffice: pretend you are going on a month long vacation and take everything with you that you would need. Have a friend come in to your house and give him free reign to get rid of, re-organize, or give away everything else. A dumpster (or at least dumpster bag from Waste Management) will definitely be needed. Promise him you will take no offense at his choices, no matter what (because you will certainly be tempted to do so).
    • Not convinced? Then at least try this: clear off just your desk. Make it aesthetically pleasing, and get all clutter off of it. Put a crucifix or other holy image at the center. How does that make you feel?
    • Especially and above all consider throwing away (or otherwise ridding yourself of) those things that are especially not ordered towards holiness:
      • Your Television: Why do you need this? It is easy to check the weather or the news online in a fraction of the time it takes to do so with your television, EWTN can be watched live online anytime, anywhere for free, and you can likewise easily watch the occasional edifying movie on your computer as well. TVs are ordered towards excess in their very nature it seems; their placement, their size, etc. A friend of mine rightly calls Televisions “anti-tabernacles,” for when one sits in front of a Tabernacle in contemplation, he has grace poured into his heart. When one goes to “veg out” in front of a TV, he has grace sucked right out of his heart.
      • Your social media accounts: I’m not telling you what to do: only you know what you are called to do in this regard! But do consider it. You are probably doing much good through your Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc. But you are probably doing far less good than you think you are doing, and almost certainly doing far less good than you would be doing if all the time you spent on these was spent doing real works of mercy in real life, face-to-face with those whom you serve.
  • Make sure you regularly partake in wholesome enjoyments. As a newly re-awakened Catholic, I remember subtly falling into some dualistic views; thinking that this life was nothing but a test for eternity, and all that matters is whether you pass that test. Although there is some wisdom in that mindset, and it is helpful to rid oneself of laxity and lukewarmness (which are certainly worse and more widespread traps than rigorism and overzealousness), that is nevertheless not the incarnational view of life that Catholicism provides! We ought to enjoy ourselves, so long as this enjoyment is put in its proper place by right reason — that is, after the pursuit of holiness and the undertaking of the duties of our state in life. Wholesome enjoyment actually energizes you for the more zealous undertaking of the pursuit of holiness — that is largely how you can gauge whether any given activity really is a wholesome enjoyment. Make small enjoyments part of the daily routine, and larger ones part of the weekly routine. Focus on enjoyments that are free or inexpensive, easy to plan, and edifying.
    • Enjoy a couple beers with good devout friends somewhere that does not blare terrible music or surround you with television screens. Go out for coffee after morning Mass on Saturday with people you enjoy.
    • Take regular walks in places of quiet, natural beauty (cemeteries are excellent, underused opportunities for this. They are among the few places today not inundated with noise, advertisements, and ugly, artificial materials/lighting). Go on hikes in nearby mountains or trails; in such a manner and at such a pace that you are doing them to truly soak in the incredible beauty of the unsullied creation of God that surrounds you; not rushed through to brag about how many peaks you’ve climbed.
    • Play a sport in a laid back, enjoyable (but still competitive) manner. Sports can be such a great endeavor, or such a spiritually damaging endeavor. They will be the latter if undertaken out of a desire to dominate others, show off your physical prowess, or simply get a scholarship to college.
    • A good novel, classical music, an engaging subject to study (perhaps History), good art, an enjoyable hobby (woodworking, knitting, or what have you.). The list goes on.
    • Beware (do not categorically condemn, but beware) enjoyments that require a screen or a smartphone; as well as any modern fad.
  • Rid yourself of daily/weekly habits that you foist upon yourself as unnecessary burdens that only drain your energy and hamper your pursuit of holiness. We are more fragile than we sometimes realize; we must keep that in mind when we plan out our weeks. Reason is supposed to reign over the passions like a wise King over his subjects; not as a cruel tyrant over his slaves.
    • Do you force yourself into an exercise routine every day or every week that you utterly despise and dread? Try going for a regular prayer walk, and/or taking up a hobby or job that involves manual labor, instead. You won’t have a 5 minute mile time or bench 200 lbs this way, but so what? You’ll be happier overall, you’ll enjoy it while doing it, and it’ll be easily sufficient for your health. The health of the body, while important, is also an incredibly easy thing to idolize. If you truly enjoy your exercise routine, then by all means stick with it! I’m just offering potential suggestions that may help some, but not others. But do be sure to analyze your motives, and be honest with yourself about whether you really are enjoying your exercises in a wholesome manner, or whether you are simply doing them out of pride, vanity, fear, or addiction to an endorphin rush.
    • Do you spend oodles of time hanging out with certain people only to realize that neither you nor they actually enjoy it or are edified by it? We must indeed spend very much time with our spouses and with our non-adult children, whether or not we enjoy it (hopefully we do!), but please do not foist upon yourself the burden of feeling obliged to spend large amounts of time with anyone else. I am not advocating for a selfish approach to allocating your time; all I am saying is that you cannot permit others to inject themselves into your life even if your own discernment says that this is not benefiting your spiritual health. Oh how much peace and joy is lost when we shoulder such burdens without any reason! Often, very often, it is God’s will that we do shoulder such burdens; all I am saying is that we should not shoulder them merely out of habit, momentum, an uncalled-for level of openness, or a false sense of obligation where none exists.
      • Scour the writings of any mystic, and mark my words you will find the same thing: spending time with people who are too unreserved, talkative, giddy, frivolous, gossipy, worldly, or the like, is something that should be very much avoided. Don’t fall into the false-humility trap of thinking that it is judgmental to use prudence in deciding whom you spend time with.
    • Do you eat a certain food daily that you can’t stand? Unless it’s at a doctor’s specific orders, it is probably not necessary for your health. God gave us many healthy foods, not this or that so-called “superfood” to be essential for everyone.
    • Even externally holy habits can become an unholy burden. I am definitely not encouraging you to abandon your current regimen of prayer and fasting; but I am indeed advising that you do all you can ensure that these proceed from an internal desire to serve God, not from a sense of external imposition (and certainly not from a desire to appear holy to others; if you receive praise from men, then that is your reward, and you have none from God). His yoke is easy and light. Consider that a mortification that is true and holy and pleasing in God’s sight causes less suffering than would exist in its absence; for love draws one to desire to suffer with the beloved. Should those who do not find in themselves a desire for fasting and penance and mortification then simply lead a life of comfort, simply following the bare-bones precepts of the Church, and nothing more? Of course not; they should meditate on the Passion more and develop a desire for solidarity with the Suffering Savior, and they should also go out of their way to see His sufferings in His Body; the Church — in the poor and the sick.
    • Examine the endeavors you partake in weekly; of those regular events that drain you and depress you, ask yourself “Is this a necessary duty for my state in life? Does my health require this? Is this a real work of mercy that someone needs? Am I aiding in the glorification of God and the salvation of souls with this? Does true charity ask this of me?” If this answer to all of those questions is “no,” then why treat yourself sadistically?
  • Post a holy picture along with a prayer right in the spots your eyes wander to when  your mind is idle. Opposite your bed in a spot with sufficient light to see, on the dashboard of your car so that you can see the reflection of it in your windshield, next to the bathroom mirror, in the shower, next to the toilet, etc. Strategically placed holy reminders can be an enormous aid.
  • Set your alarm clock to play a holy hymn. There are many apps and programs for this if you use your computer, smartphone, or tablet as your alarm clock. What a better way to wake up this is than to an obnoxious beep, or to some radio station that will be playing who knows what when your alarm goes off! Waking up to a holy hymn will help your first thought of the day to be a holy one, and set the tone for the rest of the day.
  • Have a folder of Holy Inspiration on the desktop of your computer. If there is one thing we neglect in the spiritual life, it is effort aimed at the inflaming of our holy desires. How many examinations of conscience, spiritual guides, lists of virtues, and the like, are written — and how good these writings are! But how can we have the strength to pursue these without the desire for them being inflamed to the degree of ardency? No man is sufficiently strong to long pursue that for which he has no strong desire.
    • There is nothing wrong with making use of whatever licit means Providence makes available to us, in this respect. Is there a scene of a movie that reminds you of the Mercy of God? An edifying song that inspires in you the love of God? Have all of these available to you a mere click away whenever you are on your computer. Their effect will of course wear out over time; so be it — God’s will is whatever happens. But that should not dissuade us for using them for His Glory while we can.
  • Have something easily accessible — subtly — on your person that merely touching serves as a prayer. How often the moment surprises us with a pressing need for prayer! There is usually not enough time to formally kneel down and pray a Rosary, and perhaps our surroundings make it so that we cannot even audibly pray anything. Needless to say, in such situations, pray mentally. But our prayer is greatly benefited if there is some sort of physical accompaniment to it; embodied creatures that we are. Rosary beads in your pocket work very well. Perhaps a Marian consecration chain as a bracelet. Inside my wife’s and my wedding rings is engraved “To Jesus, through Mary,” that — along with the fact that it is a sign of our sacrament of Matrimony, blessed at our Nuptial Mass — helps me to truly feel I am praying simply by subtling touching it with my thumb. A crucifix or a scapular that can be easily grasped at any moment. Some holy medals in your pocket…
  • Try adding a little more formality to your life. In days past, formality had always been a cornerstone of daily life; not merely of the rich, but of all who could manage it. It helps remind us that life is not about those few events that people today seem to solely dress up for — interviews, big receptions, and the like. It’s about each day’s prayer, family life, and work. These things are worth treating with respect, manners, and formality; when we do so, we aid in their sanctification. I remember how impressed I was when, as an undergraduate at RPI, I attended a leadership conference at Annapolis (the Naval Academy). The students (called “midshipmen”) there were sometimes referred to as “the happiest depressed people in the world.” Referred to (tongue-in-cheek) as “depressed” because they lacked the “freedoms” that have become expected of modern undergraduate living — rolling out of bed 5 minutes before your first class, which is at 11am, and managing to get there 10 minutes late still in your pajamas because of so much partying or video game playing the night before. Yet the midshipment, in all seriousness, were called “happiest” because all of those “freedoms” are utterly ridiculous and do nothing but destroy your life if you use them in that manner. The discipline and formality of the daily lives of the midshipmen, while indeed difficult, caused their happiness. Let us strive to imitate their example.
    • Try beautifying the dining room a bit; and use it for every day’s dinner — not just when you have company over. Consume a few extra watts with nice incandescent light bulbs, or even light candles.
    • Consider adding a little more formality, kindness, and chivalry to how you treat those you live with, day in and day out.
    • Consider dressing for dinner at home like you’d dress for dinner at a restaurant.
    • Consider acting at when at home with only the usual people around a little bit more like how you would act if an important guest were over.
  • Leave for everything 10 minutes earlier than you now do. Constantly being in a rush is one of the most effective ways of making grace run off of your soul like water off of a rock. There is no time to relish the moment, no time to respond to the needs of those you pass, no time to evangelize, and no time to pray carefully, if you’re rushing. Could you imagine if Jesus was always in a rush? The Synoptic Gospels would be half as long. And the anxiety and stress of always being in a rush wears on your soul, not to mention your body (it seems many if not most physical ailments have stress somewhere in their genesis), not to mention your wallet (speeding tickets, gas, wear & tear, etc. And that’s nothing compared to the damage done to your soul if you develop a disdain for civil laws. Sorry; our country being gravely erroneous in some areas doesn’t mean you can disdain civil law.) You really can afford to leave 10 minutes earlier. No matter how little sleep you’re already getting; you can afford 10 minutes less, or you can stop scheduling things so close together! Do this and watch all of the opportunities for grace that Providence has wanted to shower upon your life open up before you; and see things that you used to have to strive with such difficulty to achieve happen naturally.
    • Ponder especially how you can make your commute more edifying. If you’re an average commuting working American, then this commute is a very big chunk of your life. We must not overlook it, then! Could you take a different route that, even if it takes a few extra minutes, has fewer billboards, less chaotic traffic, more beauty, etc.? You might find that changes your life. Are you making sure to make good holy use of your commute, or do you simply zone out, daydream, listen to non-edifying music, or listen to even less-edifying talk radio? Pray the Rosary. Listen to an Audio Bible. Listen to some good homilies (like the ones on www.audiosancto.org).
  • Make Commitments. Good resolutions that are only that are usually just symptoms of our mood. Sign up for things.